“His intentions are good,” said my friend as we sat down to speak about her current relationship and the issues that are bubbling up. Her boyfriend can easily be described as the “nice guy” who doesn’t think twice when it comes to giving a helping hand. And while his intentions are pure, one needs to ask what it is that he is really sharing with these women who seem to constantly be in a state of distress? Well, it’s energy. The exchange of energy between and among people is a beautiful aspect of living in this world. Yet this aspect in an intimate relationship seems to be lost more often than not due to the lack of understanding that the exchange of energy in these situations is unique.
The exchange of energy between and among people
is a beautiful aspect of living in this world.
When I first started dating my current boyfriend back in August, I was very taken aback by his lack of awareness to the exchange of energy he had with others (especially women). As we were getting to know one another, he seemed to feel that it was okay for him to be emotionally available for other women; and, at times, physically available to one particular friend with whom he cuddled with from time to time. I didn’t want to jump to any conclusions since I am open to the opinion and understanding of how other’s think and/or act, but this never sat well with me. My soul didn’t reconcile with his actions. I felt the disconnect of energy from his end to me while I was giving all of my energy to him. His distribution of energy to other women weakened our relationship to the point of us calling it quits by the time Halloween rolled around. I knew that I was deserving of all of his energy and that there wasn’t room for compromising on my end.
We are all various forms of energy.
We are all various forms of energy. The particular energy that is exchanged within an intimate relationship is sacred and needs to be treated as such. There is no room for this energy to be shared with others outside of the relationship at hand. Why? Well, there are actually many reasons. When one is receiving energy from another, it is preventing them from being open to a potentially more deserving love. For example, there is no such thing as just a “booty call.” When individuals are sexually active they are sharing a sacred energy. This energy that is being shared should actually be emulating from their temple in order to allow another’s energy to be called in. However, the energy is instead being shared with another that is not fucking deserving of it. This prevents them from being open to love. I am constantly telling those around me that they need to acknowledge what it is that they are truly giving in any relationship.
Another aspect that needs to be understood is that the exchange of energy in an intimate relationship is what creates the strength and bond between two people. Think of a relationship as one rope that is shared between two individuals. There are many strands (i.e. energy) within the whole of the rope and for each strand that is removed the rope becomes weaker, eventually becoming a string that can easily be pulled apart. We must be sharing and exchanging our energy properly in order to keep the strength that a sustaining relationship requires.
We must be sharing and exchanging our energy properly
in order to keep the strength
that a sustaining relationship requires.
Lastly, the intentions of others are not always crystal clear. While one person may be sharing their energy just to be of assistance, the other might simply be asking for it because they want something that isn’t theirs for the taking. We, unfortunately, live in a world where jealously exists and we must be aware of this. Relationships are tricky enough and adding a vicious component like jealousy to the mix makes everything a whole lot tougher.
It is up to each of us to truly understand to whom it is we are giving our energy and whether or not it is worth it. Be aware of your power and share an intimate energy only with someone that can be trusted and loved.
P.S. On a side note, my boyfriend and I found ourselves at the same place at the same time on Thanksgiving day and have been inseparable ever since. He came back into our relationship with a better understanding and newfound respect for what it is that we are truly sharing with one another within our intimate relationship. We have found a way to flow through the growth of our evolving relationship.